About Possibly Ellie
So Possibly Ellie is my new online journal among a ton of others through the years. Sad to say this is the first one post-Vince, who has been around for a big chunk of my life. I shall miss him a lot. He was a big blogger and I guess he inspired me to stop slacking off and write again. So here I am. If you're reading this and you know me, I'd be surprised since I'm on the fence whether I will be sharing this with people.
I want to be as free and intimate as I can with writing here. I don't want to censor myself.
Today is Sept. 21, the infamous date in history when then President Marcos declared Martial Law. It's a day of oppression of freedom of expression and human rights. I guess it's apt that I go ahead and reclaim this date for myself and do the opposite. I want to be able to express myself. I need to let out these thoughts I've been having lately. Life has just gotten so complicated.
Papa is going to undergo his last chemo session then a month after, he's going to get another surgery so he can go back to the way he was. I'm just relieved he survived this ordeal. Money isn't even an issue anymore. We do what we can. I used to be so obsessed with earning but after a year of struggling with my father's cancer I find that it's not as bad as we all thought. We can get by.
Speaking of cancer, Vince died 10 days ago. It's been very painful and I've been slow to accept that he is really gone. I feel like I'm a different person now. I've been feeling this was since my UK trip and his death just cemented it. Things just feel very off. I want more.
This blog is definitely about feelings and rants, ramblings and the thoughts you can't share with people coherently. It'll be about possibilities and defining moments. I want the future to be bold and different. I want to experience things. To give a shit about life and issues. I want to leap into the void and float light as a feather. I want to stop myself from thinking too much and having sleepless nights. I want to be the Ellie I've always hoped I would be.
See you in the wild side!
I want to be as free and intimate as I can with writing here. I don't want to censor myself.
Today is Sept. 21, the infamous date in history when then President Marcos declared Martial Law. It's a day of oppression of freedom of expression and human rights. I guess it's apt that I go ahead and reclaim this date for myself and do the opposite. I want to be able to express myself. I need to let out these thoughts I've been having lately. Life has just gotten so complicated.
Papa is going to undergo his last chemo session then a month after, he's going to get another surgery so he can go back to the way he was. I'm just relieved he survived this ordeal. Money isn't even an issue anymore. We do what we can. I used to be so obsessed with earning but after a year of struggling with my father's cancer I find that it's not as bad as we all thought. We can get by.
Speaking of cancer, Vince died 10 days ago. It's been very painful and I've been slow to accept that he is really gone. I feel like I'm a different person now. I've been feeling this was since my UK trip and his death just cemented it. Things just feel very off. I want more.
This blog is definitely about feelings and rants, ramblings and the thoughts you can't share with people coherently. It'll be about possibilities and defining moments. I want the future to be bold and different. I want to experience things. To give a shit about life and issues. I want to leap into the void and float light as a feather. I want to stop myself from thinking too much and having sleepless nights. I want to be the Ellie I've always hoped I would be.
See you in the wild side!
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